3. The Anti-Joke Chicken (& anti-jokes in general): Gets me every time...
A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "What'll it be?" And the duck doesn't say anything because it's a duck.
A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park.
What did the homeless man get for Christmas?
How do you make a plumber cry?
Kill his family.
What is red and smells like blue paint?
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Why did the boy drop his ice-cream?
He was hit by a bus.
Why was six afraid of seven?
It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.
Yo' momma's so fat, she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.
What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer?
We are both lawyers.
& my personal favorite:
What's green and has four wheels?
Grass. I lied about the wheels.